The Great Hogwarts Invasion
by keitaya
Summary: An invasion of the furry kind...
The great Hogwarts invasion

This was inspired by something I saw on Facebook.

I never have and never will own the rights to the Harry Potter universe. I'm just happy to play here.

00

1965.

A year that no one who lived through it would ever forget, as much as many had later wanted to.

The school year started out innocently enough. Students arrived as they usually did, bringing with them their pets or familiars. Looking around there were animals everywhere. Nearly every student had brought something with them, but it seemed that cats were the preferred animal that year.

Days after the new term started it was announced at dinner one night that there was a small problem in Ravenclaw House. Several of them in fact. A student's cat had given birth to a litter of seven kittens that would shortly require new homes.

Suddenly there seemed to be announcements of new litters of kittens needing homes on an almost daily basis. Tabby, Siamese, Persian, Kneezle or cross breeds. If you could name the breed or type then it was probably strutting through the halls, climbing on the curtains or defecating in the potion masters shoes.

Those poor students who were unfortunate enough to be allergic to cats were keeping the hospital workers busy dispensing allergy relief potions on an almost continuous basis.

By November Professor McGonagall was unable to stroll through the halls in her animagus form without being accosted by packs of lustful admirers.

After being cornered by a pack of ten ('or was it twelve?') male cats looking for a (or just to) mate she transformed back into a human and shooed them away. "This has got to stop!" she muttered, heading towards the Headmasters office.

00

"Professor Dumbledore! We need to do something about all of these cats!" Professor McGonagall stated heatedly as she strode into his office followed by three kittens. "I cannot change into my animagus form without a brawl starting. Today alone I have been followed and accosted by a large number of male cats looking to mate. Not to mention that having cats wandering in and out of classrooms at will is terribly distracting for everyone. Several students have been injured because they tripped on one of the animals. And I am not even going to begin to discuss the excessive noise levels. Most of the time, especially at night, I can hardly hear myself think with all of the 'mating' calls and noises. I just cannot fathom how the students can concentrate at all. The amount of times I have been told that 'a kitten shredded my homework' as an excuse for not handing in assignments has been astronomical. Something has to be done!"

"I will speak to the students at dinner tonight." He replied, pulling a kitten off his phoenix's stand, where it was trying to reach Fawkes's tail feathers. "This has gone on for far too long."

00

After watching the cats and kittens run amok in the Great Hall Professor Dumbledore knew it that it was well past time to act. He could hardly believe his eyes. While he had estimated that the cats outnumbered the students the proof of his theory was quite shocking. They were everywhere! On and under tables, walking around the rafters, sharpening their claws on the centuries old table legs, climbing on the Hogwarts tapestry crest…

Stepping up to the lectern he held up his hands for silence. "Good evening students" Professor Dumbledore said and then stopped and frowned as he pulled a kitten out of his long beard, placing it gently on the floor. He then continued "Much to my disappointment, it has come to my attention that many, if not most, of the cat owners in the school have been rather irresponsible with their pets. You may have kept them fed and housed, yes I will grant that you did that, but how many of you have had your pet neutered or spayed? Very few is my estimate. This irresponsibility has led to a population explosion of our feline friends that has led to disruption of the school and the injury or inconvenience of many of your classmates and teachers. So I am imposing the following solution to this problem.

"Tomorrow morning all students who own a cat will be given a magically enhanced box that is bigger on the inside. You will place your cat and all of its offspring in there and they will be kept in there until such time as they are all desexed or sent home to your families. These boxes can fit up to twenty cats at a time comfortably and are self-cleaning with access holes for food and water so will be more than adequate for a few days.

"If, after physically looking, you cannot find your cat's offspring then a simple 'Accio female cat names kittens' should bring them to you safely. If you cannot perform this charm please ask an older student or a teacher for help. I expect all cats to be in these boxes by tomorrow night's curfew. Any cat found to be wandering the halls after Friday of next week will be checked to see if it is desexed and if it is not it will be humanely disposed of. That may include rehoming them or, as a last resort, having them put to sleep. If your cat has been desexed then you will please present it to your head of house where the cat will be fitted with a magical collar to show that and it will have its owners name and house inscribed on a tag. This is to make it easier to identify the animal and should, Merlin forbid, anything happen to it the owner will be quickly notified.

"To assist in preventing this from happening again I am arranging for Mr Ripumof from the Magical Menagerie to come and humanely desex your animal. This service will be either paid by you on the day or your parents can alternatively be billed. I believe that the rate is only three sickles per animal. Please ensure that all kittens are included in this.

"I am hoping that this year was just an anomaly but it will not be allowed to happen again. After the winter break all cats must be desexed before they will be allowed to stay with you here at school. This will be a permanent rule from now on. If there are any reasons why you feel that your pet cannot be desexed, such as for pedigree reasons or due to the age or ill health of the animal, then please feel free to come to either myself or your head of house to discuss the matter. Thank you all for listening."

00

From that time on the Hogwarts letter included a new line.

'Students are permitted to bring either an Owl, a Cat or a Toad. Please note that all cats are to be properly desexed or they will be returned home. Remember 1965!'


End file.
